June 14, 2009

Nameless

Hmmm. We are still nameless here.

Names that have been discussed include: Snickers (too obvious), Scamp (no self-fulfilling prophecies, please - plus he looks nothing like Lady & the Tramp's son).

I liked Joss for Joss Whedon who created the TV show Firefly and the movie Serenity. And since the main characters were once resistance fighters called browncoats, it seemed to fit. If Joss wouldn't work, I'd settle for Nate. (The main character's name is Mal, but the actor is Nathan Fillion ... I'm all about the crazy tangential references.)

Those have both been totally vetoed.

Other half suggested Ghiradelli. Meh. Ghiri for short (gear-ee). Meh.
Another person suggested Scharffenberger with Scharffy for short. The chocolate thing just doesn't really do it for me.

The maybe list - maybe from both of us:
Petey
Pixel
Rascal

I think Hunter might work. We've also kinda played with Camo.

Of course at this point, Daemon, Holy Terror, Dammit What Are You Doing Now, Where'd He Go, Stop That, and Go To Sleep ... these all might work.

I still want a browncoat name, though. Grrr

Pouncer
Cowboy? (We know of another brown doxie named that though)

Oh good grief, he just somersaulted out of a kennel - threw himself with the back legs and forgot the front ones were planted.

Posted by Red Monkey at 7:24 PM | Comments (1) | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | Stumble

June 12, 2009

Star Wars Geek

I am a Star Wars geek.

Not so much that I can name every bounty hunter in all 6 movies. I don't watch the crappy Clone Wars cartoon (I tried one day ... it reminded me of the last time I tried to watch the Superfriends cartoon. Ridiculously stilted to the point of unwatchable).

I don't actually own a Jedi robe. I have not (yet) built my own lightsaber. And somehow, we haven't gotten around to getting the original movies on DVD yet. (Definitely need the one without Lucas' later crap added on.)

I do, however, read some of the books. I discovered a long time ago that despite how much I absolutely LOATHE Star Trek, the original series, some of the books were actually pretty decent. I really can't watch the show because of Shatner and nothing else. Armed with that knowledge, I started checking some Star Wars books out of the library many moons ago and discovered there were some damn good ones. And, with a "hobby" of reading children's books, I was delighted when they brought out the Young Jedi Knights series - a series for young adults revolving around the next generation of Solo and Skywalker. And, I was terribly impressed with the characterization of Leia's and Han's twins, Jacen and Jaina.

Jaina was quite a lot like her dad - a mechanic, a pilot, into action a bit more than introspective navel-gazing. Jacen was very empathetic, very thoughtful, prone to the most inane and wretched jokes, and he loved animals/creatures of all sorts. The opening of the first book had Han coming to visit his children at the Jedi Academy with flowers for his son and an engine for his daughter. Sure, the flowers were a food for Jacen's pets. Sure it was done quite deliberately to shock readers out of stereotypes.

But they didn't leave it a shock-level thing; it was a one-time "trick." And you quickly realized that it fit the characters perfectly and thought no more of it.

The kids' series was a splendid run and I still enjoy going back and reading them. I quickly branched out into the main storyline of the Star Wars 'verse and discovered that the franchise was perhaps getting even better in the books than the original three movies. The New Jedi Order segment of books was stunning. The Dark Nest, not so much, but it contained some vital information that led into the absolute tour de force that left me reeling in Legacy of the Force. (These "titles," by the way, all cover multiple books. Some are trilogies, some are longer. I think New Jedi Order, which was just an incredibly rich storyline, hit something like 21 books including an e-book novella.)

In a lot of ways, I think the books have now told the basic storyline of the prequel movies far better than Lucas' movies did. In the Legacy of the Force we see a fall to the dark side that makes sense and shows it happening to a character we actually care about ... something Lucas just did not set up well in the prequel movies at all.

I can't remember the last time a series of books hit me as hard as this New Jedi Order and Legacy of the Force runs. The writers, largely because they have the luxury of "space" (not restricted to a 90 minute or 120 minute film) had the time to set up the characters (those who weren't already established) and the time to let things evolve in a natural matter instead of forcing things through in a short period of time. There was no need for "Five Months Later..." or any nonsense like that.

If you enjoy strong characterizations and SciFi, I really recommend these books. And, if you could start out with the kid's Jedi series, it would be even better. If there was one kid to fall to the dark side ... well, I wouldn't have picked this one from the beginning.

The books show how easy it is for the best of us to be seduced by thinking we're doing good and how hard it is to jump off that track once we're on it.

Posted by Red Monkey at 11:16 PM | Comments (0) | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | Stumble

June 9, 2009

Escape ... with phat stacks

So, there's this song that I liked back in the day, called "Escape," but most of us call it the Piña Colada song. What sucks about being in "the" demographic is that far too often your best memories of back in the day are co-opted by inferior marketers who usually just screw it up.

Except sometimes they actually get it right.

And boy did Taco Bell get this one right. So right, in fact, that 30 seconds was just not long enough. Not being an in-front-of-real-live-people kind of singer, I'll just give you my alternate lyrics with two caveats.
1) It's completely fiction and I was rather thinking of Office Space whilst writing it this evening.
2) The main chorus utilizes most of the Taco Bell commercial's lyrics.

Oh and another thing? I don't actually like piña coladas, either. Like I said, it's fiction.

I'm so tired of this working
I've been at this too long
Like a gear in a clockwork
Of an ancient machine
So while I sorted some widgets
I wrote this song in my head.
Then tonight in the want ads
There was this letter I read:

If you like piña coladas
hate getting stuck in slow lanes
if you're not into meetings
and your boss has no brain
if you hate filling out your time sheets
in the bowels of the basement
Then I'm the cashflow you've looked for
Write to me and make cash

I didn't think about my coworkers
I know that sounds kinda cold
But they're all hacks anyway and
I need to leave behind the same old dull routine
So I wrote out an email
Answered that job posting fast
And though I'm no Twitter expert
I thought it wasn't half bad

Yes I like Piña Coladas
And not getting stuck in slow lanes
I'm not much into meetings
I am ready for phat stacks
I've got to interview after work tonight
And I need insurance fast
Got jacked by O'Malley
And I need Vicodin now

So I waited with high hopes
And the reply hit my inbox
I knew the Subject Line in an instant
I knew the turn of his phrase
It was my Nigerian partner
And he said, "Oh dear friend."
Then we scowled for a moment.
And I said, "You owe me big"

I thought I'd be out of the ratrace
Not getting stuck in slow lanes
No more boring meetings
Finally using my own brain
No more punching out time clocks
And enjoying my time

Selling crap on the eBay
And winning a big lottery...

Posted by Red Monkey at 9:35 PM | Comments (0) | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | Stumble

June 2, 2009

From All The Girls With Band-Aids On Their Knees

I haven't gone to see Up yet - I know, I know. I will see it soon. But I came across this blog post from NPR today and well ... yeah. Just yeah.

Dear Pixar, From All The Girls With Band-Aids On Their Knees

by Linda Holmes

Dear Pixar,

This is not an angry letter. It is especially not an angry letter about Up, which I adored. I could have sat in the theater and watched it two more times in a row. I cried, but I also laughed so hard in places that it wore me out.

So I'm not complaining; I'm asking. I'm asking because I think so highly of you.

Please make a movie about a girl who is not a princess.

I adore Pixar and wouldn't they just do a STELLAR job with a non-princess girl/woman as the lead in a movie?

Posted by Red Monkey at 6:45 PM | Comments (1) | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | Stumble

May 24, 2009

Pup The Magic Dachshund

So Scraps the miniature-dachshund loves puppies. Particularly dachshund puppies. If you've ever seen the weird dachshund magnetism that occurs when two doxies are in close proximity you'll understand. If you've never seen this ... well, I had two little magnet toys as a child. They were both little plastic Scotty dogs on top of a small bar magnet. One was white and one was black. If you put them near each other with the heads pointing toward each other, the polarities attracted and the dogs snapped together.

Dachshunds apparently have some kind of dachshund magnet that pulls with an even greater force than the typical "Hey, look another dog, I wanna go see" force. Dachshunds absolutely MUST see each other at all costs.

Scraps knows when we've been to see other dogs. Okay, most dogs can smell another being on you, no surprise there. Scraps knows when it's a puppy. He tried digging through my pockets one day looking for the dachshund puppy I'd petted that day. It drove him nuts (not to mention he drove me crazy). On top of that, Scraps had a toy puppy that he treated like a real pup. He fed it, he put it on the puppy pad (cuz that's what you do after you eat, you know) and he even devised a way to "play" rope tug with it. He desperately wanted another dog in the house.

So we finally brought him his very own puppy.

He absolutely adored baby Scout. Today, at 7 and her at 5 ... he thinks she might be defective. She refuses to play tug. She makes these odd rooing howl sounds that he finds quite undignified. And, even worse, she has more energy than any hound should ever display.

So today ... apparently shortly before a meth house exploded about 10 or 20 blocks north of us ... we went back out to the breeder from whom we'd gotten Scraps. For a little look-see.

 

We pick up the little dappled guy June 10th. WOOHOO!

And no, no name picked out yet despite the title of the post. We need to see a little more personality before we can pick.

Posted by Red Monkey at 9:50 PM | Comments (6) | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | Stumble

May 7, 2009

Ba Dum Dum Cha

I can recall overhearing my mother give her mother two edicts regarding me - no basketball hoop to put up over our garage (and yet, Grandma bought me a basketball hoop one summer for being good - and it languished in their garage because Mom wouldn't let me take it home & Grandpa wouldn't put it up at their house either) - and no drums.

Of course, Grandma bought me a kiddie drum when I was 6 or so. I ignored every other present and instantly ripped it out of the box and began beating away. I would disappear into my room - or our converted garage playroom - and wail away to my heart's content. As I left elementary school, we were given the opportunity to join the junior high band and the director came to school to give us some aptitude tests. I wanted to either play drums or saxophone. Can you guess how that went?

Finally in high school, I bought a used snare drum and would turn my stereo up ridiculously high and play along when no one else was home. Eventually, frustrated by the lack of a complete set, I sold it off. Since then, it's been an endless stream of table drumming, lap slapping and the odd hand drum here and there. I bought Wii Music because it had a drum kit in it and I thought that would be a cheap way to explore having a whole kit. Nope. Couldn't stand the way it worked. (Anyone wanna buy it?)

Next, I thought I'd try Wii Rock Band Special Edition. This at least came with a kit of four drum pads and a pedal for the bass.

Meh. I really don't like the way the kit sounds. Any of their programmed kits. (Anyone wanna ... oh hell, I need to box it up for eBay, don't I?)

The next thing I discovered in the last week or so is the cajon. Now this is a freaking cool box drum. It's all wood and you sit on it to play it. (Seriously, click through the link to a picture and description - and you can choose to watch the video if you're in a place where you can do that. It's pretty freaking awesome.) Our choir director's other half brought her new cajon to choir the other day so I could mess with it. The sounds ... wow. The thing is awesome.

But to get the tones I like the best, you have to strike pretty loudly which means I would never be able to play with it - my other half would shoot me provided her migraines didn't leap out of her skull and kill us both. I toyed with getting the bongo sized cajon, but I don't really like the higher tones, so I figured that was out as well.

Instead, I trolled through Amazon just to see what was out there. And I discovered the drum kit that I really want. Here's a YouTube demo. This sucker is the ultimate in hand drums. And from what I can tell via the YouTube, the deeper tone is exactly the kind of thing I'm looking for. Plus, I could change the sound for different kinds of playing.

Best of all, this can be played much more quietly than the cajon. Don't get me wrong, I still think the cajon is incredible. When I'm filthy rich and build my dream house with the big-ass sound-proof music room, I'll definitely get a cajon to play as well. But for now, I should probably stay more reasonable ... :)

Seriously, anyone interested in buying my Wii Rock Band? I think I played it twice. Guitar, mic - everything except the drum kit is unused .... Hey, I gotta fund the purchase of the next drum somehow!

Posted by Red Monkey at 6:14 AM | Comments (1) | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | hobbies | Stumble