Oh, I See
August 31, 2006

I was born in Amarillo, Texas. Then we moved to Houston. Another place in Houston. Then Albuquerque, New Mexico. Then, off to Oklahoma City. Then Carmel, Indiana. Austin, Texas. Then I started kindergarten. Some of you regular readers and obsessive archive perusers know the litany of places I've lived already. In addition to that, I started elementary school at Pillow in Austin ... then was transferred to St. Louis, which I hate hate hated, and went back Pillow ... for the first six weeks of third grade. Then we moved to Arlington, Texas, where I finished elementary school (that was elementary school #3, for those keeping score). Instead of 6 semesters at the local junior high, I had 3 at one school and 3 at another. The only school I stayed at all the way through to completion was high school ... and my father announced one day that we'd be moving to Singapore. Luckily Mom refused, which saved me from having to figure out how to become an emancipated minor or the best way to run away.

Ooops ... that wasn't the point of this post. I told you all that just to point out that my mom's parents also lived in Oklahoma City for most of my childhood, eventually moving to Tallequah, Oklahoma for their "retirement" home. (Well, okay, if you know the Tenkiller area, they technically lived in Cookson, which at the time was nothing more than a couple of houses and a post office ... in fact, I'm not sure that there's much more to it than that now.) At any rate ... it's an ADHD kind of day, can you tell? I feel sorry for the guys I work with today. Maybe I'll get really into a project and calm down soon. Anyway, I was really excited when my grandparents moved to Lake Tenkiller, because, well, it was a LAKE.

So, probably the first summer they lived there, I got to spend a big chunk of my summer with my grandparents. Naturally, they were a little unsure exactly how to keep a 13 year old (almost 14!) occupied for the entire summer, so they enlisted the aid of the local youth group at their church.

After working on the house of some elderly members of the church for a couple of days, we all went out to the lake for a picnic and swim. Naturally with teens of that age, we separated into a group of boys and a group of girls. The boys, being completely unsure how to show their feelings, decided to let us know of their undying interest in us (at least until a cool car drove past) by throwing rocks at us. Well, they were trying to see who could throw a rock the closest to us without actually hitting us. Kind of like a game of pitching pennies on the stoop.

Also, they were trying to see if they could annoy us and who would move away first.

Being the stubborn little shi- err, twerp, that I was, I insisted that we hold our ground. Err, hold our water? Hmm. At any rate, I insisted that we were going to stay put.

That was when it happened.

I looked up and over at the boys. One of them looked a bit panicked. I wondered why. Briefly.

Then my eye hurt like hell.

Yup, the inevitable had happened, and I got nailed just barely above the eyeball. Everyone flew everywhere. The boy who'd hit me was horrified. We rushed back up to the picnic tables and one of the nuns (yes, nuns ... another time I'll have to tell you about being in the van with the nuns ... frightening!), one of the nuns handed me ice to put on the eye.

Slowly my vision in my right eye, my good eye prior to this accident, was turning white. Before long, the stolen moments of opening the eye and sneaking a peek confirmed it. Everything was like some thick, fluffy white cloud through which my vision could not penetrate. I sighed. Apparently I was going to lose the vision in that eye. I was hoping that it was simply the ice on the optic nerve causing my vision to essentially freeze, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. I began preparing myself for the worst. And that meant preparing myself for telling my mother how I had been so careless as to lose the vision in my right eye. Because, of course, this happened the one week she was visiting her folks.

Well, as it turned out, I was "in trouble" for being so careless as to get hit above the eye, but my vision was ultimately unharmed. The ice, had indeed, been depressing the optic nerve and froze my vision temporarily. Examining the tiny cut in the mirror, though, showed just how incredibly, amazingly lucky I had been. Literally a millimeter or two lower and the small rock probably would have popped the eye out of the socket or at the very least, damaged the eyeball itself.

A week or two later, when I returned home from my summer at grandma's, Mom took me in to see the doctor and have this near-eye injury examined. (Yes, really, a week later before I saw a doctor.) He confirmed that it had been a very near thing and he asked me to tell him what happened.

"I got hit in the rock by an eye," I rattled off.

He blinked. Tried to decide if he was concerned or going to laugh. "What happened to you?"

"I got hit in the rock by an eye." I decided he didn't hear me clearly the first time.

He smiled a little. "I don't think that's what happened to you."

Some part of me utterly panicked at this point. What the hell was wrong with this dude??? "I got hit in the rock by an eye!"

He turned to my mother and gave a little grin. "What happened to her?"

Mom was utterly puzzled. "She got hit in the rock by an eye."

At this point he must have decided that it was genetic instead of a concussion. "I don't think that's quite how it happened. I think," he turned back to me, "you got hit in the eye by a rock."

"That's what I said, I got hit in the rock by an eye!"

He chuckled.

It wasn't until Mom and I returned to the car and were talking about what the bleeding hell was wrong with this doctor that we caught the problem that you've already seen.

Oh. Oh yeah. Umm. Sure. I got hit in the EYE by a ROCK.

Good grief.

Posted by Red Monkey at August 31, 2006 5:04 AM | People Say I Have ADHD, But I Think - Hey Look, A Chicken | | StumbleUpon Toolbar Stumble |


Red said:

ROFLMAO....only a dyslexic can truly apperciate this story!
You rock ender...thank you for giving yet another good laugh.
Now take a deep breath and FOCUS...lol Have a great day!

Red Monkey said: heehee ... naw, I don't rock ... I eye! (that sounded a lot funnier in my head ... hmm)
August 31, 2006 7:20 AM


Babs said:

It took me awhile to see the problem with the doctor too! LMAO!

August 31, 2006 1:53 PM
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