Do You See What I See?
August 27, 2007

... a star, a star, shining in the east ... blah blah blah. I suddenly forget the rest of the words anyway.

I should start this post by mentioning that I once nearly got thrown out of the Dallas Museum of Art for proclaiming my views on modern art. Well, sort of. See, I was dragged to the art museum by my other half who was an art student at the time. And we made the mistake of going to the modern wing first. Whilst I was really hyper. And there was this canvas that was painted red. Like with a roller. Just ... red. No funky shape. No design in the red. Just a canvas painted red.

This offended me. Any monkey can do that. There is no art in a red canvas. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar and sometimes the crap the art establishment refers to as art is just crap.

Anyhow, I was in a highly sarcastic (to some people that means annoying ... to me, that means hysterically witty and funny) mood. And I kept up a nice running commentary throughout the modern wing. Now, once we got into the stuff that actually takes some modicum of freaking SKILL to create, I was enjoying the purty pitchers and stuff.

Then we walked into the very cool Egyptian room. Nifty stuff abounding. And as we walked out of the "tomb," we see this HUGE ... TALL ... MONGO wooden statue of a woman sitting in a chair. Yanno what they say about Texas women? The higher the hair, the closer to God? Well, this woman had them all beat. And, without missing a beat myself, I said, perhaps a mite too loudly, "LOOK! IT'S MARGE SIMPSON!"

Every child in the museum turned and laughed in total agreement.

The security guards, for some convoluted reason, took exception to this. Maybe it was because there were about ten different school groups there.

Anyhow, that's all backstory. What I really wanted to talk about is THIS.

To me, and I realize this is a subjective field, to ME, this is paint slop. This is not art. I can get Cubism, although I don't like it personally. But it's art. I can see Impressionism as art. Surrealism. I can see a lot of the Isms as art.

To me, this painting simply looks like the work of a four year old. That's it. Paint smeared around. Random, for the most part. Playing with paint (and there's nothing wrong with that!).

But, museum-worthy, great sums of money worthy, art ... it ain't. It's paint and canvas and no great shakes.

However, the art of the four year old Marla Olmstead of New York is being touted as the work of a child prodigy. They are comparing her work to Jackson Pollock and Wassily Kandinsky.

In my opinion, that's crap. She's sold 25 paintings, or rather her crafty parents have, and they've made $40,000. That's an average of $1600 a painting.

OMFG ... there are people honing their craft out there making nothing. This kid is playing with paint and raking it in.

I will never understand the New York "high art" world. Never.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go watch I've Heard the Mermaids Singing and enjoy the visual one liners.

Posted by Red Monkey at August 27, 2007 12:55 AM | Never Underestimate the Power of Human Stupidity | Sketches | | StumbleUpon Toolbar Stumble |


Manictastic said:

Ender that painting is so definitely art. Do you see that yellow stain that looks like a banana. Clearly the young artist wants to express that life is nothing more than a banana and that when it's over we are tossed on the ground to make people fall over and have other people laughing at the unfortunate accident. I cannot understand why you do not see this, I thought you were clever.

August 27, 2007 9:07 AM


Jodi said:

And I cant sell ONE painting? MY WORD!

August 27, 2007 9:09 AM


Damien Riley said:

Banana? How could you miss the lack of solid lines indicating lack of focus indicating the state of our world today, oh wait . . . my glasses were off . . . scratch that.

Red Monkey says: I can just hear Eddie Izzard saying that ... banana.
August 27, 2007 10:55 PM

lol...I knew this got to you. Perhaps you could consider adopting this great finger painter.

August 28, 2007 9:32 AM


Nim said:

hehe, the Marj Simpson thing had me howling.

Iffn you want art buddy try having this outside your workspace...

What makes it REAL art though, is when the drunken students stick a traffic cone on it's head and it's still there when you get into the building on a Monday morning!

August 29, 2007 4:41 PM
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